Archive for September, 2007

29
Sep

soon

   Posted by: rads    in fable

Soon 

From where I sit stretched far from people and water, I watch a little girl as she sits hunched playing with sand and water. Running to and fro from the waves, she was absorbed in building a sand castle. Or so it looked.

A little boy stands at a distance watching her. As if on cue, she looks up towards him and waves. He comes forward eagerly, thick hair tousled in the wind, eyes bright, face clean as a shiny new penny.

Hemming at the edge, he asks “what are you doing?”

“Building a sand castle. Do you want to help?”

“Yea sure, am good at it!”

“O really? Thank you! Here, you can use this pail, and I have 2 shovels too.” Handing over her little pieces of plastic she excitedly digs deeper.

“No wait, let’s build higher up. You are too close to the waves. The water will come and wash our castle away”

And so they move up further away from the surf. The sand gets dug deep, water gets fetched, molds are made, little hands form passage ways, strong palms shape the wet solid sand. Towers are standing, a curtain gets added, we need to make the keep strong, here, let’s add a peak, how about some turrets. O yes, that looks good, but see, this tower is taller, no, I don’t like it that way. Okay, let’s make it smaller, is this better? Oh no, we forgot the dungeons, what do we do? Well, dungeons are for bad people. In our kingdom, no one’s bad. So we don’t really need one. We can build a moat if you want, and a drawbridge – that should make it grand right? Do you like it? Yes, yes, I love it. Here, I made this little flag for the Keep. I am scared I’d bring the whole thing down if I go any closer. Here, hold my hand, and I will hold on to you, while you reach closer. Yay! There, I did it! I did it!

She jumps around the castle in glee, gives him a hug and says “Thank you so much, you are my bestest friend ever”

“You are my friend too” He smiles.

“Okay, come let’s play?” She asks, her almond eyes lit in the fading light as the sun takes a dip in the water.

“No, I have to go. I can’t play. Maybe some time later?” he starts walking back.

“Are you going to come back?” she asks disappointed.

“Yes. Soon.” He runs away without turning back.

So she sits beside her pregnant promising castle.

With every moon that waxed, she grew smaller. The moat fills, the drawbridge goes under, the right wing, and then the left, melting into one’s own, until just the flag could be seen from far far away. Thoughts and memories turn into sparkly crystals in the wet sand, some clinging onto her tiny brown toes, some riding the wave, it seemed like they were on the move. A tussle between the choices.

I hear her murmer to no one in particular: “is Soon there yet?”

:

Music: Phil Collins’ Against all odds  

24
Sep

present

   Posted by: rads    in fable

A recluse divorced from the world, she watched as the string of words cross her eyes. Eyes darting from space to space occasionally misty, with surprise, a smile, a shiver down her spine. Words with depth and meaning, of little kisses that stretched to lingerings of passion. Of everything in between and of nothing at all. Torrent of letters, free flowing like the rush of tropical rains she was used to. Nascent to her fingers, and mind, yet strangely, in a comforting envelope.

A moment in time.

…Or was he fated from the start, to live just one fleeting instant within the purlieus of your heart?

Ivan Turgenev spoke to her. Of her. A question she’d asked herself a few times lately.

Believing in fate and destiny was for the weak. One makes things happen, she’d convinced herself. Unsure of it anymore, she glanced at the little clock her dad had gifted her some 20 years ago. A frail yellowed palm sized clock that still kept perfect time. Keeping her hands steady unlike her emotions, lest she dropped it, she wound the hands around. Around and around she went, against nature, against the Sun, and against all that she believed in. Against sanity.

There, July 12th looks nice. It was a little over 2 months ago. Going back to that date wasn’t asking for the moon now was it? After all, her little clock did keep perfect time. Maybe a bit of the perfectness would rub off on her past. Wait, was that her past, or was that a future she was making?

Whatever it was, it sure wasn’t the present.

12
Sep

tag 6

   Posted by: rads    in tag

Maverick tagged me to write on why I blog and the sentiments around it. I quite feel like being interviewed by Larry King or Lou Dobbs, the seriousness of the questions are quite startling, and at the very least thought provoking.

Here are the 8 questions  [wait a sec, it says 8 questions and then I see 14, did folks add on as it went around its rounds? Worse yet, should I be adding my own trick question?! ]

Q1. Are you happy/ satisfied with your blog, with its content and look?

Look – Heck yeah! I like this new place. Old one was nice too, just that I like change and this seems cleaner! 

Content – It could be better, but of course.

Q2. Does your family know about your blog?

Sister knows and kids have occasionally peeked. No one else.

Q3. Do you feel embarrassed to let your friends know about your blog or you just consider it as a private thing?

Not embrarrassed. I don’t mind sharing with certain friends who I know whould appreciate it or not at least frown on the fact that I have an online identity, so yes, I choose whom I tell.

Q4. Did blogs cause positive changes in your thoughts?

Well, it really depends. Sure it helps when you need a laugh or a change in perspective, but I don’t look for knowledge gained or huge thought process shifts on blogs. I am pretty sure there are enough of them who cater to such and not that there’s anything wrong it it, just don’t actively look for it. It’s fun and its a level of communication I enjoy.

Q5. Do you only open the blogs of those who comment on your blog or you love to go and discover more by yourself?

hmm.. I am curious by nature, and so yes, I do visit folks who read/comment, but I do a fair amount of blog-hopping. When am free at work that is.. and I also leave a mark where I go, if I have something nice to say. That’s just me, not that I have ulterior motives or work on increasing readership on mine, like I was quite vehemently accused of by a blogpal ;-p

Q6. What does visitors counter mean to you? Do you care about putting it in your blog?

They are there to boost your ego. It’s flattering to see numbers go up. That’s about it.

Q7. Did you try to imagine your fellow bloggers and give them real pictures?

Nope, not really. Don’t ask why, I just don’t.

Q8. Do you think there is a real benefit for blogging?

It really depends on the kind of blogging or thoughts you put in it and ultimately what returns you expect, short-term and long-term.

For me, blogging’s fun, interaction with other bloggers is refreshing, and of course along with more heads comes more trouble, but it’s all good in the long run. It’s even come to a point where I sort of treat it as a friend. Like venting here when there’s no place else to turn to. I hope to keep at it awhile at least, funnily it’s close to 2 years next month and if am still here, I suppose that ADD I fear is receding after all…

Benefits are subjective opinions. Each to their own.

Q9. Do you think that bloggers’ society is isolated from real world or interacts with events?

Hm…. not really. There are some fine spaces there that address real world issues and do a good job of it. Once again, it really depends on what you want to make your space. Entertaining, humorous, poetic, feminist, daily dose, cuisines, travel.. I mean, how far removed can you be from the real world in any of these?

Q10. Does criticism annoy you or do you feel it’s a normal thing?

Constructively put thoughts never really annoys anyone who’s willing to grow. I don’t. It’s the wisecracks, ribs, and taunts that I avoid. I have a long rope, but once it gets taut, I will snap and it ain’t going to be pretty after that.

To answer Maverick’s question – I had the disclaimer because I had my usual share of crappy dirty comments that I suppose most female bloggers face. This is my space and am going to protect it and keep it the way I want it. I moderated comments which are nasty and not in the true spirit of the blog. I’ve had a huge spat with a couple of fellas on emails and after a while it’s time to bring the hammer down. Criticisms are no big deal. I am no baby :)

Q11. Do you fear some political blogs and avoid them?

Nope, don’t fear, just don’t imagine I have anything useful to offer there, and so skip right past along them.

Q12. Did you get shocked by the arrest of some bloggers?

What? Arrest? Why, what happened? See, am that clueless..

Q13. Did you think about what will happen to your blog after you die?

haha, I was saying the exact same thing to a friend a few weeks back. I wonder what would happen to mine. I suppose my sister would let you all know.. eventually, but by then most of you would’nt be logging in to check on me anyways, considering that the blog would go not updated for days together, so ultimately, really, who cares?

Q14. What do you like to hear? What’s the song you might like to put a link to, in your blog?

Like right now? hmm.. Rudali sounds good to me. In a melancholy mood and Lata’s voice is haunting. Bhupen Hazarika’s version is excellent! It’s hard to pick…

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_3Sfv29pzn0]

Since I am “nice” and don’t tag folks that often and since I didn’t with my last tag, I’d like to be true to the tag rules and pass the baton onto

1. Archana – She’s like 5 years into it. Some enthusiasm eh?

2. Pilgrim – Yes, he’d make a good candidate me thinks!

3. Twisted DNA – I had to tag him, coz a little birdie told me that he hates tags, and what kind of blogger would I be if I don’t put him on a spot?! So yes, let’s see him work his magic on this. ;-p

4. December Stud – Yeah, that’s who. Let’s see what studman has to say.

5. BPSK – Please? :)

A plea – Please please can no one tag me for a while? Please with a cherry on top? I am so tired doing introspective peeks into myself that there’s really nothing left there to peek. It’s like empty within. Echoes are threatening to hit me.. If you have to tag me, I will do it of course, just in January 2008. That’s okay right?